Crying Out
It’s no secret that having twins is difficult. I’ve talked about it in my previous posts and will continue to talk about it until it’s no longer a struggle….so you’ll probably hear about it as long as I have this little blog.
When we found out I was expecting twins I had a real heart-to-heart with God. I told Him that I knew I could handle it because He never gives us more than we can handle but that I really couldn’t deal with colicky babies. I asked Him to spare me the crying/screaming fits and prayed for babies that were like my Lucas (the absolute DREAM baby!).
Well, that just hasn’t been the case. Yes I’ve had a few good nights and the girls aren’t always bad, but more often than not I am not getting much sleep and it has been wearing down on me. Last night, as Livia was starting up with her crying match for the evening (they like to take turns and it was apparently Livia’s night on crying duty) I started crying. Jesse was rubbing my back as I had tears run down my face and he asked me why I was crying.
I told him I was so angry with God. I had prayed for babies that didn’t scream/cry and here He gave me babies that DID. I was angry that the night before I prayed for rest and the girls were up almost every 2 hrs with at least one that just wouldn’t settle in between. After the tears and Livia fell asleep, I ended up getting 3.5-4hrs between feedings. The girls would eat and then go right back to sleep.
He heard my prayers.
The thing is. I know He’s always been listening. There is some reason He didn’t give me rest the other night. There is a reason He has given me these girls. I just have to keep giving it all to Him and know that there is a purpose & a plan.
I will say that I have the absolute best husband in the world though. He is bending over backwards to make my life easier. I absolutely adore that man and couldn’t imagine going through this crazy time without him by my side.
Have you ever found that you prayed for something and it didn’t seem answered/heard?
Keep up with Michelle at The MommaBird.
Yes, absolutely. I was a first time mom with my twins boys. Around the 5-6 week mark, the intense colicky stage started. I did not realize there was a delay in the development. I was already so exhausted from feedings every 2-2.5 hours that when the hours of screaming and crying started, I felt like I was on the verge of a mental break. I was truly crying out. It was so difficult at that time but God gave me and my husband little gifts and graces along the way that allowed us to get through it.
It’s so nice knowing I wasn’t alone. The girls will be 4 months in a few days and for the last 3 weeks they have been sleeping from about 7pm-8am! It’s amazing what getting sleep does for the body & soul. That whole stage seems like such a blur now…it’s nice knowing there is always a light at the end of the tunnel 🙂
Amen. Quite frequently I’ve felt like that.
Hang in there hun, this too shall pass! It’s so hard when you are in the middle of it, but it will get better!
xoxo
Beautiful post! Thank you for sharing!
It seems trite (especially as I’m about to quote Garth Brooks and show my age…HA!), but some of God’s greatest gifts are unanswered prayers.
The best to you and your family!!!
Great post and great outlook! I just want you to know it gets easier! Stay strong! Mine are 20 months and we are having the best time!
It’s so tough. Your post brought back many memories of times my prayers were answered differently than what I would have planned. On a good note, the first year felt like never ending struggle, but each year after I can look back and say, “well that was a lot better than the 1st year”. Thank you for a heartfelt post and good luck to you.
I remember one time getting angry with my husband for praying that our twins would sleep well that night, because invariably, when I prayed for sleep, my twins would have their worst nights sleep.
It got better.
There have been several times that I have asked God for something and didn’t get the answer I wanted. It’s times like that that I have to remind myself that God’s plans for me are much better than my plans for me. If I trust Him, everything will work out. I can honestly look back and say that I’m grateful that God answered my prayers differently than I wanted Him to.
This is an AWESOME post…I know exactly what you are talking about as all of my kids have had SEVERE colic and I remember days when I was crying with them…and I would just ask for a little help and it would come in the form of an extra hour of sleep, a call from a friend or many other ways..the Lord always here and he does answer!!
I always remember that God knows all and the things that happen and the way prayers are answered is to help me and to prepare me for what may come.. Hang in there and remember crying is good for the soul as well 🙂