While parenting is one of the most rewarding experience of most of our lives, it can also be one of the most challenging times. Children demand a lot of time, attention, and money. These kinds of demands can be stressful enough for a traditional couple, so extra struggles come into play when you are acting alone in this endeavor. Arguably, this is why being a single parent raising multiples is one of the hardest situations. I have been a single mom of twins on several occasions, first when my girls were 2 years old for a year and then again when they turned 5.
Being a single mom, you have to learn to be everything in one. Every parent has to wear multiple hats, but when you are a single parent, you have to take on every job. You are the breadwinner, the caretaker, the chef, chauffeur, entertainer, and so on. This already overwhelming amount of responsibility is even harder when you have to take on these roles for two. Sadly, this situation is all too familiar for many moms out there. On the brighter side, these strong people are there to show you that you can do it!
Being a single mom raising twins solo does not have to be as hard as people make it out to be. You can do this.
Investing some time in being more organized can make your life a lot easier. Try to have a schedule that works for you and your twins to eliminate some of the pressure. Having a consistent structure is not only good for you, but it is something that makes it easier for your children as well. They will know what to expect, and you will have less stress trying to figure out what to do every day.
When obstacles arise that disrupt your schedule (someone gets sick, or you have an appointment), never feel bad asking friends and family for help when you need it. Asking for help may be hard for some people, but most people will be very understanding of your situation. Chances are, you are going to be asking for a lot of help, especially if you are managing a job on top of parenting multiples.
Be more mindful of your expenses.
Money will be harder for single moms of twins because there is one less of you and the double amount of kids. Finding a job that is accommodating to a parenting schedule can be a bit difficult, but finding ways to save money doesn’t have to be.
It is important to remember that when you have twins, you don’t have to buy two of everything. Baby things can be expensive, especially stuff like bouncers and playpens. Most things your twins can share, and they really won’t mind at all. Also, not everything has to be an investment. Babies grow up so fast, it won’t be worth your time or money to purchase expensive everything.
There are loads of groups and online communities that are dedicated to collecting the latest and greatest deals and tips for saving money. Just a quick internet search for coupons and sales, and signing up for a few newsletters can save you hundreds of dollars a year! For this to really work, have a list of things you need, observe prices, and buy when you know its really a deal. Don’t fall for all sales as those can sometimes be deceiving.
Pay attention to yourself. Yes, you have double the work and half the help, but remember that you can’t give your best to your children if you are not well. As stated above, don’t be ashamed to ask for help and make some time for yourself as frequently as possible. Daily can be irrealistic, but even once a week or even once a month can make a significant impact on your overall well being.
Above all, it is important to remember that there is no such thing as perfect parenting. Never feel bad if your house isn’t spotless or your kids are misbehaving a little bit. Just try to have as much fun as you can. Children don’t stay small forever, and you will miss this stressful time more than you realize.
In these times of social media, don’t let anyone fool you. Every parenting journey is filled with their own unique struggles, and no one has a perfect drama-free life. Never feel ashamed with leaving kids with a sitter for some you time and never let anyone tell you that you can’t do it.
If you are a single parent, share with us down below some tips on how you do it!